Your High Friend: “What If D-backs Acquired Dumbo Instead?”

Dumbo
Imagine if an animated elephant played baseball, is more or less the essence of your friend’s point.

The record — which, in this case, has been carefully prepared by great Italian-American sporting writer Nick Piecoro — the record shows that the Arizona Diamondbacks have acquired today Los Angeles Angels corner-type Mark Trumbo in a three-team deal also involving the Chicago White Sox.

What your totally high friend wants to know, however, is what if — instead of acquiring Mark Trumbo — what if Arizona accidentally acquired cartoon elephant Dumbo instead? Because, according to your friend, “that’d be hil-larious.”

“Hilarious, indeed,” is what you’re forced to also say, at this sad, sad juncture of the human comedy.




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Ralph
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Ralph
2 years 9 months ago

So the trade was-
Arizona got: Dumbo
Chicago got: Seton (University)
Los Angeles got: Maggs (Ordonez, mayor) and oregano

I think Arizona got fleeced in giving up an institution of higher learning with an endowment of $231 milliomn and getting in return a cartoon elephant. On the other hand, Los Angeles also got fleeced in giving up a cartoon elephant and getting in return a socialist mayor (not much use in the United States) and a spice.

mccarve it up
Guest
mccarve it up
2 years 9 months ago

hi-larious not hil-larious

Ryan
Guest
Ryan
2 years 9 months ago

I bet Dumbo would have an insane BB rate due to a small strike zone. He’d probably get plunked in the ears a few times, too.

You say hi-larious, I say BRILLIANT! The Dbacks picked up a miniature Shane Victorino. Both are mammals and switch hitters, presumably. Dumbo would still likely K less than Trumbo.

Brad Johnson
Member
Member
2 years 9 months ago

“Both are mammals and switch hitters, presumably.”

+20

Corey
Guest
Corey
2 years 9 months ago

Once someone figured it out it would become the elephant in the room.

ettin
Guest
ettin
2 years 9 months ago

High friends are so earritating.

Bill Brasky
Guest
Bill Brasky
2 years 9 months ago

I hear he’ll play for peanuts.

Will Smith
Guest
Will Smith
2 years 9 months ago

If I’m the GM, I’m all ears.

buuuuuuuuford
Guest
buuuuuuuuford
2 years 9 months ago

All this time I thought they got an overpriced hipster neighborhood in Brooklyn…

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