Albert Pujols Is Back!

On Sunday, Albert Pujols broke his season-long homer drought. Which means only one thing. Albert Pujols is back. All season, we’ve been telling you it’s been bad luck, small sample size, just a quirk of the data. And that one at-bat, that one home run, proves that we were right. Sure, his batting average is still under .200, his OBP under .250, his SLG under .300, but it’s only a matter of time. If you extrapolate from that one at-bat where Pujols hit the home run, you can estimate that he will hit over 500 more home runs this season, and get his batting average up to about .800, where it belongs. And, sure, the critics might argue that it’s only one home run, it’s only a 1-for-4 day, it’s nothing to get too excited about… but not everyone can hit a home run and go 1-for-4. Not everyone in the major leagues is capable of hitting one home run. Look at Ben Revere. Over 500 major league plate appearances, and no home runs. Ryan Dempster has had 655 plate appearances without a home run, leading active players. Sure, he’s a pitcher, but still, his at-bats count too. And with his one swing of the bat, Pujols proved without a doubt that he is a better hitter than Ben Revere and Ryan Dempster. What more can the critics want? What does he have to do to get people to stop their complaining and appreciate that they are in the presence of greatness? Does he need to go 2-for-4? Hit a second home run? Go on a two-game hitting streak? People are never satisfied. He’s back, I tell you. Back.



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Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.


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Semi Pro
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Semi Pro

He looks like Atlas in that photo.

agam22
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agam22

Atlas Slugged

Tim
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Tim

No wonder his April was unproductive and interminable.

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