Proposed Marketing Slogans for the 2013 Blue Jays

The flag of Metropolitan Toronto flies politely over the region.

As FanGraphs managing editor Dave Cameron noted over the weekend, the Blue Jays’ acquisition of right-hander R.A. Dickey is merely the latest in a series of aggressive, but reasoned, offseason maneuvers that have positioned the club as a legitimate contender in the usually competitive AL East.

Now, the Blue Jays’ marketing department is tasked with spreading the word about what promises to be an exciting season for Toronto. However, as the five following proposed slogans — acquired by our very secretive Investigative Reporting Investigation Team — as they indicate, it is not necessarily within the Canadian nature to brag or boast or otherwise champion one’s own virtues.

To wit:

1. Come Out and Watch Us — Unless You Already Have Plans, No Problem!

2. We’ll Win a Lot — But Not by an Unsporting Amount, Don’t Worry!

3. You’ll Enjoy This Team — Not That We Presume to Know Your Tastes!

4. What a Great Team — Although, All the Teams Are Great in Their Own Way!

5. Let’s Go, Toronto — And All Other Area Municipalities, Too, Like Halton!

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Carson Cistulli has published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.

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Hiding in the Wrigley Ivy
Hiding in the Wrigley Ivy