Recommended: Sitting in the Shade and Drinking

Salt River Field: Just one example of where you can sit in the shade while also drinking.

A recent study conducted by the author at Salt River Field in Scottsdale, Arizona, reveals that SITTING IN THE SHADE AND DRINKING is a wonderful pastime worthy of our attention.

Aggrieved by winter? Try SITTING IN THE SHADE AND DRINKING. Like at a mostly unimportant spring-training game between the Angels and Rockies, for example.

SITTING IN THE SHADE AND DRINKING has been proven — in no fewer than one test case involving the actual person writing these words — has been proven to create pleasure on the inside part of a person for upwards of four hours.

Don’t care for/don’t have access to alcohol? SITTING IN THE SHADE AND NOT DRINKING is also an entirely pleasant activity.

That said, SITTING IN THE SHADE AND DRINKING remains nonpareil in terms of one’s pursuit of happiness.

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Carson Cistulli has published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.

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I’ve tried sitting in the sun and denying oneself beverages. Not a big fan so I guess I’ll give this a try.